You Don’t Have to Hide Anymore

He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along (Psalm 40:2, NLT).

Recently, I was on a walk doing some praying and thinking. I’m currently working through a Bible study, Trustworthy, by Lysa Terkeurst. I’m only a couple of weeks into the study, but it’s been great so far.

What I love most about a structured study is that it often catapults me into a period of processing during which the Lord will reveal things to my heart. So far on my Christian walk, I have found that spiritual sanctification requires me to stand in front of my spiritual mirror. Rather than recognizing it as an opportunity for growth, I sometimes refuse to look up and think about what I see staring back at me. Why? Because when I do, I know I am truly stepping into a process of discovering what lies beneath the broken pieces of my heart—and that is scary. It leaves me feeling naked, afraid, and ashamed.

Maybe you’ve felt this way before, too. The enemy would love nothing more than to keep us paralyzed by this fear and hidden behind our brokenness, but God wants us to look up, come out from our hiding places and trust Him as he helps heal our hearts in a way that allows us to be used for His glory.

Let’s walk together as I share with you a story of how God has recently reached out His hand, lifted my chin, and reminded me that I am who He says I am.

I had a hard, emotional day last week. It kind of caught me off guard, as it usually does. I had just watched the Southland sermon about our emotional well being as it relates to forgiveness. It was a wonderful message, but it was the kind that can leave your head swirling with thoughts and, for me, it left my heart overwhelmed with emotion. I began thinking about the relationships in my life, where I need to extend forgiveness, places I may be holding on to unforgiveness, and the status of my heart as it relates to all those things.

Processing can be very productive. Until it isn’t anymore. Do you know what I mean? Recognizing I was headed down a rabbit trail of negative thinking, I set off on a walk and cued up some worship music as I tried to steer myself back onto the narrow path.

During my walk, a good friend called, and we began discussing how the Lord had spoken to each of us through that morning’s message. Before I knew it, my emotional dam broke and my friend experienced a bit of an uncontrolled release of words regarding the status of my heart. Though we didn’t have time to work through it all together at the time, we hung up with the promise to get together soon and share more.

Shortly after hanging up, I was feeling frustrated with my emotions and the way I handled myself during our conversation. Thankfully, this friend is incredibly caring, thoughtful, and intentional to seek the status of my heart when she detects something is “off” with me. I love that about our friendship, and it’s been such a gift. But, it also challenges me to crack open the broken parts of my heart and spread them out on the table for someone else to see. Talk about vulnerability.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation of trying to describe your emotions, while simultaneously realizing just how spiritually naked you’re allowing yourself to be with that person? It’s a big deal. But, when it occurs within the boundaries of a safe relationship with a trusted friend, it’s an avenue through which the Lord can bring so much growth and healing.

After that conversation with my friend, I realized later the source of my frustration: I was allowing myself to be exposed, and the enemy began attacking my thoughts. If he could convince me to feel shame for my emotions and the decision to expose myself, maybe I would cover up again. Maybe I would drop my head instead of staring at my reflection in the mirror to better understand what God says about me.

Since the beginning of man, that’s what we do when we feel shame. We hang our heads, and we hide. In Genesis 3, shortly after Adam and Eve had committed sin in the Garden of Eden by eating the forbidden fruit, it states in verse 8, “When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the LORD God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the LORD God among the trees.”

How often do we conceal the very things in our hearts that God wants to reveal, heal, and ultimately, use for His glory? When we succumb to the voice of the enemy, it is so easy to be convinced that divulging the truth of the confused and messed up parts of us is the wrong thing to do. That’s been a struggle for me many times in the past, just as it was last week. But, every time I choose vulnerability with an audience that knows my heart and points me to Jesus, I’m allowing His light to flood the space and begin to piece together the shattered parts.

In a book called Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead, author Brene Brown writes, “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”

I believe when we begin expose the deeper parts of our hearts, we open ourselves up to attack from the enemy. This is precisely because he knows when we choose to walk down that path we will begin to experience greater healing, growth, and freedom in Christ. But that requires us to come out of hiding, stand in front of our reflection, and look up.

What is it in your life that leaves you feeling fragile and fragmented—an absentee parent, a job that makes you feel like you never measure up, a broken relationship with a child, the unfulfilled yearning of being a wife, a past marred by abuse and neglect? I’m not sure what God wants to expose in your life, but I can promise you that Jesus sees and knows our hearts so intimately that we can’t even begin to comprehend its significance. But, I really believe that in order to receive the fullness of His love, we have to look up, expose ourselves, and let Him into those places.

Thankfully, the Lord has grown me tremendously over the last couple of years as He has taught me how to look in the mirror, sort through my thoughts, and emotions to determine their source and the direction they’re leading me.

What does that look like for me? In terms of specific action, I have found that I must be diligent about prayer, structured time for studying God’s Word (through a Bible study, for example), and genuine connection with Christ-following friends. Though I better understand what it looks like now to do that, some days are still just hard. And that’s okay. I encourage you to spend some time reflecting on the ways God helps keep you on the right path when you’ve hopped on the wrong one. Once you discover how He speaks to your heart, it will make it easier to be intentional to seek Him in those places when you’re struggling.

When we find ourselves in a place of sadness, struggle, or suffering, as I did that day, my heart is drawn to Psalm 40:2 where David writes, “He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.” What a beautiful reminder!

When we look around and recognize we are in a place of despair, whether that be physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually, we can rest in the assurance that God will steady us as we walk along. Today when you find yourself in front of a mirror, stop and take a moment to think about what you see staring back at you. But this time, instead of seeing yourself as the broken mess of being a sinner, I pray you’ll begin to see yourself the way Jesus does: forgiven, chosen, and loved unconditionally. When we process from a place of remembering His truth, we’ll be reminded that we don’t have to hide anymore.

1. Brown, Brene. “Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead.” Essay. In Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead. Penguin Random House Audio Publishing Group, 2017.